HIS BURIED HEART
It began with his mother. Before he could even walk, she controlled him. He was hers forever more, and he didn’t even know it. Women he met later realized this … when they couldn’t break thru the invisible leash and reach his buried heart. A veneer of playboy charm covering up layer after layer of secrets and shame. A relationship that he would take to his grave … and beyond.
A bisexual from birth, she gradually changed him. A revenge on the child himself, it was all part of her master plot to keep the man he would become away from the women she would later have to compete with. A loving attentive mother to some, but a pedophile with a plan to others. All done behind closed doors when no one else was looking, she would squeeze and fondle him, and then taking him to her breast, she climaxed. Then with a style all her own, she squeezed him again in the front while she entered him with the other hand from behind.
Telling him he was special and superior to girls, his mother slowly groomed him toward a world of misogynistic men. Placing him on a podium, she appeared to be at his beck and call catering to his every whim. But in reality, she was always a general in charge. Training him to help her from an early age and never attacking his weaknesses, the bond between mother and son strengthened while his secret contempt for other females increased. Raised by a different kind of mother, the girls he was most attracted to became the enemy … and their strength and independence the weapons they employed.
A pedophile until he reached puberty, his mother’s real attraction was to other women. Marrying only to have a child, she had clandestine affairs on the side with other lesbian pedophiles. With their pearl necklaces and their trays of cookies, they lured the children in … all the while playing the role of the perfect mother and the model citizen. Church on Sunday, PTA on Tuesday and volunteer work on Thursday. Respected leaders of their community, no one ever suspected what was really going on.
When he was 16 and his mother was no longer attracted to him, the master plan took another direction … from her bed to that of her lesbian lover. Telling the boy it was time for him to learn how to please other women, this would be a safe environment for him. A woman he had known most of his life as a family friend, she was attracted to this child age the most. But what should have been enjoyable for him, turned out to be an experience with a woman impossible to please. No matter what position he tried, he could never get it quite right. Constant adjustment was recommended, and he always felt that he failed more than he succeeded.
Declaring himself an unsatisfying lover for women, he began to look elsewhere. Before he met the woman he eventually married, he had numerous affairs with men… both married and single. Reminiscent of the pleasure he felt as a child with his mother, this was the kind of sex he enjoyed the most. But with it, came shame and fear that others would find out. So slowly over time, he formed relationships with other men who felt the same way he did. A secret alliance, some would say. Preferring the lifestyle and societal benefits of a heterosexual couple, they all lived double lives. Some of the women knew, and some of them didn’t. But all were victims of this type of misogyny … in public and in private.
In another part of the world, there exists a group of primates whose lifestyle is not that dissimilar. Living in the forested areas of the Congo basin in central Africa, the bonobo apes are a matriarchal society where the mother-son bond remains strong throughout their lifetime. A highly sexual and non-monogamous group, incest is common to build up the strength of the mother. Described by some scientists as a peaceful and loving group, others have found contrary evidence that supports they are cannibals who hunt down and eat other infant monkeys. For more information, see: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bonobo
Copyright © 2015 (Michelle Parsons, Getting Back on Your Path). All Rights Reserved.
